Canto Foul

by Count Olaf

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about

Thespian Thrash...
Dreadful Dirges...
Melancholic Metal...
Awful Orchestrations...
Scoundrelous Soundscapes...
Recalcitrant Rock...
and Coded Codas...

...all by ME.

(Except for some small and piddling minor musical additions provided under my strict instruction by my Artistic Associates and Treacherous Troupe, but, honestly, they were more trouble than they were worth. Let's face it, we know who played all the good bits.)


NOTE: In no way is this project associated with L.S. or D.H. or A.S.o.U.E, a phrase which here means "please please please don't sue me".

credits

released November 16, 2016

COUNT OLAF: guitar, vocals, bass, drums, lyrics, artwork.

The orphan featured on the introduction to "Olaf-Land" appears entirely under duress, a phrase which here means "she had a simply cracking time and would happily do it again".

tags

license

all rights reserved

about

Count Olaf Cape Paterson, Australia

COUNT OLAF!

"Count Olaf is perhaps the single greatest gift to music the world has ever seen. Whether you like heavy metal or not, you'll adore Count Olaf. And he's so incredibly handsome too!"
- The Completely Legitimate Review Quarterly, 2016
... more

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Track Name: It's Not Quiet Here
WE'RE ALL ORPHANS IN THE END
BY POISON DART OR FIRE, FOE OR FRIEND
WHAT WILL RISE WILL HAVE TO FALL
OH, IT'S NOT QUIET HERE AT ALL

TRUE LOVE AND FIRES AND MURDER AND DEATH
FORTUNES AND LIARS AND VERY FANCY DOILIES
Track Name: Olaf!
I WILL CLAIM WHAT I DESIRE
I WILL MAKE YOUR LIFE EXPIRE
A PHRASE WHICH HERE MEANS "DESTROYED BY FIRE"
...DO YOU THINK I'M A LIAR?

OLAF!
OLAF!
OLAF!
OLAF!
Track Name: Very Far Down
SOMEWHERE IN HERE I AM NOBLE
SOMEWHERE IN HERE I AM KIND
SOMEWHERE IN HERE IS A CONSCIENCE
SOMEWHERE IN HERE IF YOU SEARCH YOU WILL FIND

VERY
FAR
DOWN

YOU NEVER KNOW YOUR OWN FUTURE
YOU NEVER KNOW NOTHING AT ALL
YOU NEVER KNOW YOUR OWN FORTUNE
YOU NEVER KNOW HOW FAR YOU WILL FALL

VERY
FAR
DOWN
Track Name: Olaf-Land
THEY SAY IF YOU TRY VERY HARD YOU CAN MAKE IT
BY WHY BOTHER TRYING WHEN YOU CAN JUST TAKE IT?
YOU PEOPLE WITH EVERYTHING DON'T UNDERSTAND -
YOU'LL ALL BE MY SERVANTS IN OLAF-LAND!

OLAF-LAND!
Track Name: A Sad Occasion
KIDNAP, MURDER, CONFLAGRATION
I DIDN'T REALISE THIS WAS A SAD OCCASION
FAMILIES SPLIT, RELATION SLAYS RELATION
I DIDN'T REALISE THIS WAS A SAD OCCASION
HOMELESSNESS, RISING INFLATION
I DIDN'T REALISE THIS WAS A SAD OCCASION
CLIMATE CHANGE, OVERPOPULATION
I DIDN'T REALISE THIS WAS A SAD OCCASION
SCHISMS IN SECRET ORGANISATIONS
I DIDN'T REALISE THIS WAS A SAD OCCASION
TORMENT, MISERY, OBLITERATION
I DIDN'T REALISE THIS WAS A SAD OCCASION
Track Name: Burn It To The Ground
NO POINT IN SADNESS
NO POINT IN FEAR
NO POINT IN CRYING TEAR AFTER TEAR

NO POINT IN HYGIENE
NO POINT IN RHYME
NO POINT IN REASON - BRING ME MORE WINE!

DON'T LET LIFE GET YOU DOWN
JUST BURN IT TO THE GROUND

NO POINT IN KINDNESS
NO POINT IN GAMES
NO POINT IN NOTHING THAT DON'T END IN FLAMES

NO POINT IN ROMANCE
NO POINT IN LOVE
THERE'S ONLY ONE THING THAT I'M TOTALLY SURE OF

DON'T LET LIFE GET YOU DOWN
JUST BURN IT TO THE GROUND
Track Name: Master of Disguise
LOOK AT MY DISGUISES
THE MAKE-UP ON THE SHELF
I'M SO GOOD AT TRICKERY
I BARELY KNOW MYSELF

MASTER OF DISGUISE!
TRANSFORM BEFORE YOUR EYES!

LOOK AT YOUR SURROUNDINGS
THE WORLD YOU THINK YOU KNOW
THE MILLIONS OF HIDDEN THINGS
THE WORLD WILL NEVER SHOW

MASTER OF DISGUISE!
TRANSFORM BEFORE YOUR EYES!
Track Name: Villainy Fails Dismally
VILLAINY FAILS DISMALLY
SO BE NOBLE... JUST LIKE ME
Track Name: Some Decent Help
IT'S SO HARD TO FIND DECENT HELP
THERE'S NO-ONE REALLY DEPENDABLE
IT'S SO HARD TO FIND DECENT HELP
I'M SO GLAD THEY'RE ALL SO EXPENDABLE

DECENT HELP
JUST WANT SOME DECENT HELP

SO MANY MOUNTAINS TO TRAVEL
SO MANY SINS TO ATONE
SO MANY USELESS CRONIES
IN THE END, WE'RE ALL ALONE

DECENT HELP
JUST WANT SOME DECENT HELP
Track Name: The Great Unknown
LIKE A SKIPPING STONE
INTO THE WORLD WE'RE THROWN
AND WE SINK, ALONE
INTO THE GREAT UNKNOWN

WHETHER STOOL OR THRONE
WHETHER FOOL OR CRONE
WE ALL SINK ALONE
INTO THE GREAT UNKNOWN